It is extremely frustrating not to be able to do something you love to do. Especially when it's been so hard to explain why I've found it so difficult to craft over the past few months. A few weeks ago I had a bit of an "aha moment" when I realised that I associate crafting with illness, with not being very mobile, and maybe even as a way of fending off the insanity of insomnia. In essence, I used to craft when I was at my lowest, and I think somewhere in the back of my mind I still associate the two. My life is so different since having surgery and moving back to Wales last winter - I am well, I'm healthy, I'm physically active, I sing, I'm sociable, I'm rarely at home, I'm happy - everything that I wasn't last year. And I think my avoidance of crafting is because I don't want to revert back to the way I was.
I'm being silly. Crafting is not going to make me ill again. And the sooner I break that association the better, because quite frankly (beware of the forthcoming blowing your own trumpet moment!) it's something that I'm good at. I shouldn't let my strange brain hold me back.
So, get to the point Nel. You're quite right I am rambling somewhat. I have been missing crafting. A lot. I've been craving that feeling of accomplishment when you see ideas plucked from your brain materialise into something real, touchable, beautiful. So to give myself a creative quick fix (and a little to save on funds, but mostly to satisfy a making itch), I doodled a couple of friends some Birthday cards:
My sister's fella now has an excuse to be grumpy and cantankerous!
Again, apologies for the crappy photography.
I think I'm really developing a liking for doodling. It's taming my symmetrical brain, things don't need to be even, seams don't need to match up, anything you imagine is fine and nothing is wrong. Happy days! And more importantly it's easing me into my old creative ways. I think all in all, it's gearing up to be a handmade Christmas after all!